This Is In Or Around Pretension
The Craigslist “Casual Encounters” section, from what we are given to understand, is for just that: ads for anonymous sex. But in A2, even casual encounters are meaningful. This one that was recently brought to our attention (probably not safe for work) at least starts out pretty much as you’d expect. “Don�t ask me my name. Don’t ask me where I work. Don’t ask if I’m married or have a girlfriend.” Sure, fair enough. “Ask me if we have free will.” Um, okay, if you get off on that sort of thing.
But most importantly, “I’ve never set foot in a Wal-Mart.” Is this the Ann Arbor equivalent of “drug and disease free”?
This is one of many things I don’t like about Ann Arbor. From the men seeking women section of CL.
posted by DrMandrake on February 2nd, 2005 at 8:37 amI wonder why he hasn’t been snapped up yet. What brilliant 30-something woman can resist a plump 50ish man with subclinical Asperger’s syndrome?
posted by Anna on February 2nd, 2005 at 9:32 amwow, I think I know that guy (honestly).
posted by OFW insurgent on February 2nd, 2005 at 9:39 am“Brains, I want brains.”
Maybe he’s a zombie looking for lunch.
posted by Dave on February 2nd, 2005 at 9:45 amHe could have been talking about me if he had 11 January as the birthdate…except I would never talk on the phone while some guy was going down on me.
posted by oldfatpunk on February 2nd, 2005 at 10:14 amAnn Arbor Sex-ay!
He’s just watching O’Reilly yell at him. Think he’d be up for a falafel fuck?
Businessman seeks whore, undergrad
Virgin seeks love on ‘net.
Let me jerk off at your place because my Mom can hear me at home.
Hey whores!
“Any age, but an active woman is better” says another Ann Arbor virgin. Yeah, the active ones beat the dead ones, I hear.
Pay for preggo…
And here all of you are complaining about how hard it is to meet people in Ann Arbor. Not only can you meet them, but they’ll pay to fuck you! And wow, they’re all “devestatingly gorgeous” “Wall Street type”s.
posted by js on February 2nd, 2005 at 12:02 pmThe saddest ones are the five posts in two weeks from the Asian virgin. Y’know, there are women that you can meet off the web too…
“Y’know, there are women that you can meet off the web too…”
McNichols and the Cass Corridor are ideal spots for someone with that problem…so I’ve heard.
posted by HNG on February 2nd, 2005 at 12:10 pmOkay, the zombie thing was hilarious.
Are there really that many undergrad whores in A2? And how come there aren’t any ads for cute college boys in need of financial assistance, from either women or gay men?
posted by ann arbor is overrated on February 2nd, 2005 at 1:37 pmAnd does anyone who’s NOT on CL still call undergraduates “co-eds”?
posted by Anna on February 2nd, 2005 at 2:29 pmUh, I used to live in Cass Corridor (the area of Detroit along Cass Avenue, from the Fisher to the Lodge freeways, bounded by Woodward Avenue and Lodge Expressway), and its reputation as a red-light and drug district is WAY out of date.
Anderson’s Garden, Cass Corridor’s last prostitution bar, was shut down decades ago, driven out by upscale neighbors. Among other tactics, nearby homeowners recorded the license plate numbers of the johns who parked cars on their street, looked up the owner’s name and address (back in the 70s, anybody could do that for $4 each), and mailed out postcards saying “Thank you for visiting Historic West Canfield…”
The northern third of Cass Corridor is now the Wayne State University campus; the middle third is largely student housing and yuppie/guppie homeowners; and the southern third, apart from Orchestra Hall, the Masonic Temple, and vast tracts of vacant land, seems to be populated by alcoholic old men in shabby rooming houses or subsidized apartments.
Moreover, most of the Corridor is patrolled and surveilled by the Wayne State University police, with video cameras on nearly every light post, so the rate of street crime is probably lower than Ann Arbor’s.
Please update your stereotypes!
posted by Larry Kestenbaum on February 2nd, 2005 at 3:36 pmSadly, some newspapers seem to have missed the memo about “co-ed.”
posted by ann arbor is overrated on February 2nd, 2005 at 4:05 pmLarry, what about the garage rockers? Have they no home?
posted by Brandon on February 2nd, 2005 at 8:05 pmI think the garage rockers live in Hamtramck.
posted by Larry Kestenbaum on February 2nd, 2005 at 9:18 pmIn the tradition of “sorostitute,” why don’t we say “ho-ed”?
Ok, I thought it was kinda funny.
posted by Dave on February 2nd, 2005 at 9:44 pmSince the closest Wal-Mart is in Ypsilanti (although I think technically Pittsfield Township), “Never set foot in Wal-Mart” is the equivalent of “I’ve never been east of US-23″ since some people from Ann Arbor seem to view Ypsi as the dirty cousin or something.
I like the Engineer want ad though. Pretty funny.
posted by Kozzie on February 2nd, 2005 at 9:53 pmWell, nothing’s worse than meeting someone on the Internet for anonymous sex, only to find out that they don’t even support local businesses.
posted by ann arbor is overrated on February 2nd, 2005 at 11:18 pmOr finding out they don’t have free will.
posted by js on February 3rd, 2005 at 8:08 amI like how his definition of “having brains” is all math and engineering. There are many women with brains who couldn’t give a rat’s ass about the special theory of relativity or logistic regression (and logistic regression is lame anyway), but could argue you into a hole about whether there are autonomous spaces within the power/knowledge matrix or whether or not it’s possible to make a synchronic intervention in language.
Also, I find that whole “sororistute” thing totally offensive. Sure there are a lot of sorority sluts, but if you ask me, that frat boys equally represent as whores.
The zombie comment was hella funny though.
posted by Alex(andra) on February 3rd, 2005 at 8:16 amI specialize in totally offensive. Agree about frat boys, though. I made a rude comment about them on another blog.
posted by Dave on February 3rd, 2005 at 8:40 amSorry, Larry, but I must respectfully disagree with you on Cass Corridor. Being as I’ve actually been through there several times, I didn’t see as much of a police presence as you mentioned and I saw far too many unsavory characters for my tastes. Regardless, even if the prostitution has been cleaned up, I’m sure someone desperate enough can find someone in CC that would solve them of their virginity problem.
However, there are certainly worse places (now) in Detroit. McNichols and Davison come to mind.
posted by HNG on February 3rd, 2005 at 8:52 amAlex(andra), my favorite part was, “You don’t have to get even one of these EXACTLY right - but they’re all at the edge of what I think about and talk about….I’m the kind of guy for whom those questions … are matters of casual conversation…”
I’m sorry, but who the hell sits around blabbing about logistic regression (not getting it EXACTLY right)? Beside, if he has to use logistic regression, chances are he didn’t do his experiment properly.
posted by Anna on February 3rd, 2005 at 9:33 amWhat do you prefer–categorical, logit? Enquiring minds want to know!
posted by Alex(andra) on February 3rd, 2005 at 10:48 am“Beside, if he has to use logistic regression, chances are he didn’t do his experiment properly.”
Anna, you should write and tell him that - he’ll be swept off his feet.
posted by ann arbor is overrated on February 3rd, 2005 at 10:50 amPeople who don’t live in Detroit tend not to recognize its granularity. Some assume that “Cass Corridor” is the vast region between downtown and Grand Boulevard, or even beyond. It just isn’t so. Cass Corridor is a small, defined area. All those other (and much worse-off) parts of town have their own names.
If you consider elderly derelicts who sit on curbs with bottles of hooch in paper bags to be unsavory, well, the south end of Cass Corridor still has plenty of those. But they’re harmless.
Cass Corridor also has a food co-op (founded in 1972 and still going strong) and a thriving community of artists and musicians.
The police presence may not always be obvious. Just look up at the light poles, and smile at the camera.
posted by Larry Kestenbaum on February 3rd, 2005 at 2:33 pmDon’t knock logistic regression, biatch. As a social scientist I use it all the time to make results look real that aren’t and results that aren’t look real. It’s a little game I play in my office with my bitch Stata.
posted by DrMandrake on February 3rd, 2005 at 7:23 pmI like the Cass Corridor/Midtown/Cultural Center area, personally. If I ever move to Detroit, it’s where I’d settle. Hamtramck is pretty tempting beyond (within) the city limits otherwise, though. I guess Corktown is alright, too. And Mexicantown is actually pretty dang awesome, but I don’t know how easy living in a mostly immigrant neighborhood would be as an outsider.
posted by Brandon on February 3rd, 2005 at 8:42 pmAlex — Actually, anything I can’t do with ANOVA means I screwed up somewhere.
posted by Anna on February 3rd, 2005 at 8:52 pmThe sad thing is, even though I am a perfectly normal human being, I know this guy gets more in the way of responses than I do.
Honestly, I’d like to say, “Hahaha, I’m joking” but I know I’m not.
posted by Dave on February 4th, 2005 at 2:27 amLarry, I’d been through Cass Corridor before–I used to go to Zoot’s, Cass Cafe, The Gold Dollar, The Old Miami, Alvin’s and the like, and I also thought Cass Corridor’s reputation was undeserved.
I know a couple guys on a Cass Corridor Neighborhood Development Corp. I was walking down the block with one of them recently and had some real eye-openers. “See that guy riding his bike real slow? No one rides a bike that slow. He wants to sell you drugs. Don’t make eye contact or he’ll think you want some and then get pissed off if you don’t. See that guy driving real slow? Same thing. See that woman over there? She always wants to know what time it is. See that guy on the balcony up there? Someone is always there. Folks are smoking crack up there, and that’s the lookout.”
They tell me that it is getting better and that it is improving, but I’m going to disagree with you on Cass Corridor. I’m talking about Forest between 2nd and Woodward. I never lived there, but I have it on good authority. When did you live there? Maybe it changed back!
posted by Chris on February 4th, 2005 at 12:00 pmDave, maybe you’d do better if you didn’t list “drinking, goatherding, and flatulence” as your first, second, and third (respectively) interests.
We like Homer Simpson, but none of us wants to date him.
posted by Alex(andra) on February 4th, 2005 at 3:32 pmI love ANOVA, but my all-time favorite is crosstabs. Yee haw for descriptive statistics.
posted by Alex(andra) on February 4th, 2005 at 3:32 pmAlex(andra), good point. Although I always hoped people would realize I was joking. Still, I probably shouldn’t joke. This *is* Ann Arbor, after all.
posted by Dave on February 4th, 2005 at 10:21 pmBrandon- Mexican Town, outside of the block around Xochi’s, is one of the worst places in Detroit. The freeway/bridge entrance gutted the neighborhood, so now it’s a brief blip of decent space surrounded by an assload of shady shit. The North side of Mexican Town is where you see a guy getting his ass kicked by four others and you don’t slow down to help.
posted by js on February 5th, 2005 at 10:31 amYou sure, JS? The main drag of Vernor a bit to the West looks pretty damned healthy. Hardly a vacancy to be found. That’s the “real” Mexicantown, as I understand, while the part around Xochimilcho is more the “tourist” area.
posted by Brandon on February 6th, 2005 at 2:17 pmyou’re right brandon
posted by OFW insurgent on February 7th, 2005 at 10:19 amI had a friend who lived on Bagley between Clark Park and Xochi’s for two years, and he never had problems. On the other hand he didn’t claim it was uber-safe, just that it was safe enough not to worry too much.
posted by Lisa on February 7th, 2005 at 7:04 pmFor those of you with too much spare time and curiosity who are still following this thread, here’s a random map: http://www.visitdetroit.com/linclude/maps/mexicantown.pdf
Chris I used to work on Woodward and Forest (at Hannan), and regularly hung out at restaurants and establishments around Cass Corridor during lunch and even after dark. There were the usual bums and skanks, but I would agree that it is a cool neighborhood- the “Wayne State area” is no longer the crime zone it used to be. I would agree with Larry that it’s actually getting yuppified.
posted by Alexandra S. on February 9th, 2005 at 2:49 pm