ann arbor is overrated.

Marylanders will soon get a taste of that famous Ann Arbor seafood with the opening of Mainstreet Ventures’ Real Seafood Company. The “lifestyle center” in Annapolis will also feature a Chop House.

The steady stream of letters to the News about the Avery House project has to be one of the most bland, uninspired NIMBY campaigns we’ve ever seen, but today’s just about takes the giddy biscuit. Where you’re expecting a soaringly metaphorical rhetorical-question leadoff, the writers go for the literalistic clunker “Would you accept the construction of an enormous building — a building larger in square footage than city hall — in your residential neighborhood?” But they partially make up for it with some vivid imagery: “The Avery House condominium development goes before City Council tonight, with the specter of the neighborhood near Hunt Park, in north-central Ann Arbor, being degraded permanently.” Well, here we thought it was just the neighborhood being degraded permanently, but if it’s the specter of the neighborhood, that’s a different matter.

This somewhat desultory city council video mashup of footage from last week’s meeting was sent only to Murph, as he is “the very good blogger … many others like mark mayfred and arbor dates did not receive it.”

Planning Commissioner Ethel Potts trots out the hoary concept of “quality of life” to honor departing councilmember Bob Johnson. (Okay, this was from Monday’s News, but it’s A2; do we really want to be some fast-paced megalopolis where bloggers write about something on the actual day it happened?) “Who else (on the council) represents one whole viewpoint — quality of life?” To fill the impending quality-of-life vacuum, Lower Town historic district activist (and David Cahill spouse) Sabra Briere is getting into the race.

The News leaves this tantalizing tidbit hanging out there:

In Johnson’s early tenure, he was a close ally to Hieftje. Recently, the pair has butted heads over parks funding and had a curt exchange in which an incredulous Johnson asked Hieftje at a public meeting, “Is that a serious question?'’

Well? What was the question? We have a couple ideas (”Do you think it’s ever possible to have enough neighborhood input?” “Is there some other water out there that’s tastier than A2H20?”) but inquring bloggers want to know!

Ten years and still no dog park. The reasons given at council last week — “no consensus,” concerns about the reaction of “the neighbors” — could apply to just about any delayed project in A2.

Venerated Chicago columnist Mike Royko once argued for the use of public jogging paths by horseback riders on the grounds that “First, I like horses. Second, I do not like joggers.” Well, we like dogs, and we do not like NIMBYs. So here’s two public relations tips we offer to the dog people:

1. Cite best-cities lists based on dog-friendliness, like this one, and point out that A2 isn’t on them. You have to speak the language of Ann Arborites, and if there’s one thing they can’t resist, it’s an ordered list of cities, no matter how obscure the source (”We made ebunions.com’s list of best cities for people with bunions!”) or slipshod the research methodology (”They ranked sales of Dr. Scholls divided by the square of the number of shoe trees.”)
2. Enlist a canine speaker for public comment at City Council. “Our next speaker is Buster.” Okay, dogs are notoriously unlikely to respect the three-minute allotted time, and you might earn a pithy rebuke from city attorney Stephen Postema. But surely your Airedale will have more to say than Blaine.

“I can’t think of anywhere else in the city where there is more than a two-story building in an otherwise residential/single-home neighborhood,” a letter writer to the News points out in her opposition to the Elks/Avery House project. “Such discrepancies between the heights of the dwellings change the feel of a neighborhood and make it feel less like someplace you want to live.” Perhaps we could eliminate these discrepancies by requiring every building in the area to be at least four stories.

“I urge the City Council not to approve this project,” she continues. “The proposed rezoning opens up a currently nice residential neighborhood to all kinds of troubling developments, once there is an exception made for this type of project. ” Although apparently not nice enough for the letter writer, who has moved out of the neighborhood.

The Old West Side Association newsletter praises the block of Fourth Street between William and Jefferson as an example of “accommodating diversity” at its best:

This short block is subject to a zoning nightmare: part multi-family, part public lands, part limited industrial. Yet, instead of an ugly hodge-podge, these structures blend into a unified town center, totally unlike the fakey “Towne Centre” under construction a half-mile away.

Other than a lack of puke-hued tiles festooning every available surface, what does this town center have going for it? It boasts a church, an elementary school and gardens “tended in the style originated by the early owners.” But what about retail, you ask? Well, if you walk towards Liberty, there’s the “luscious memory of the cinnamon buns that were available at Lunsford Bakery.” So not only can passersby look at gardens; they can also remember cinnamon buns. Now that’s some real diversity.

Council members display their various levels of media savvy at last night’s meeting:

   “We are not doing this in private. We’re live on TV; there are BLOGGERS following us; this is out in the open!”

   — Chris Easthope

   “We’re on TV? I didn’t realize that.”

   — Bob Johnson

Of course, this blogger had already tuned out; it took the indefatigable Urban Oasis to stay awake through a heated stormwater runoff debate long enough to hear this hilarious dialogue.