Roam If You Want to, Roam Around A2

In the latest Observer, an intrepid writer/explorer, photographed in safari-ish clothes carrying a walking stick, describes a “Whitmanesque walk” (to which he also compares a journey of Thoreau) around the perimeter of Ann Arbor, beginning and ending at Briarwood Mall.

The journey took me along streets I’d never heard of and into neighborhoods I’d never visited…I found easements going between various culs-de-sac and the expressways that circumscribe this city, giving it the shape of an inflamed internal organ.

Perhaps it’s not a coincidence that he mentions coney dogs a few paragraphs down.

Of course, this being A2, there are plenty of wacky characters:

Burton Road soon ends, and I found myself on a foot trail in Sylvan Park. When a bearded, ponytailed, seminaked jogger approached, I asked, “Does this go through?” Without missing a beat, he replied, “What does ‘through’ mean?” Only in Ann Arbor would a simple request for directions be parsed like that.

Yeah, what does “through” mean? It’s like, you go “through” something, and then you’re “through” going “through” it, but, if you really think about it, where are you? Whoa.

He finishes by mostly-intentionally summing up much of what’s wrong with Ann Arbor:

[F]or all Ann Arbor’s anticar blather, the average neighborhood has nothing within walking distance: no corner store, tavern or restaurant. But most every neighborhood was exquisitely well kept, with plenty of gorgeous houses.

24 Responses to “Roam If You Want to, Roam Around A2”


  1. “When a bearded, ponytailed, seminaked jogger approached[…]”

    I’m picturing some dude in 15 year old running shoes, tattered running shorts, with a $400 iPod strapped to his arm.


  2. The Metro Times ran a similar piece a few years ago — following an “intrepid pedestrian-journalist” on a foot-tour of Detroit.

    I would say that this knock-off has got to be a joke, but you never know with the Observer.


  3. I haven’t finished the Observer article yet. It’s nice to see recognition of Ann Arbor’s anti-car “blather” as what it is: something that doesn’t affect what people actually do.

    After all, IMTCBNWWTC.


  4. >>

    Foot off the pedal, feet on the gravel
    Fairy door dust in my hair
    Oh, don’t look back — don’t look behind you
    Feckless walkin’ on dirty A2 back road

    Freeways to Hell
    We’re burning through the cul-de-sacs
    I’ve got the devil juice in my Nalgene

    Still a long way from CVS, must
    Ride the AATA to the Target, then
    Take it hip to hip, rock through the OWS

    When we’re all exhausted,
    Coney Island Ann Arbor.
    Angioplasty!


  5. hah, i only hope that i can remain as bitter as you have by the end of my three year stint at u of m.

    maybe the crappiness of this place motivates people to get the **** out. any place is better.
    any place.


  6. >>hah, i only hope that i can remain as bitter as you have by the end of my three year stint at u of m.

    maybe the crappiness of this place motivates people to get the **** out. any place is better.
    any place.


  7. You must be AAIO!


  8. Uh - Don’t forget that Louisiana (all of it) has already been given the perpetual honor of being the cesspool of the nation. You should move there.


  9. Feckless is a good word.


  10. But in southern Louisiana, people know how to live.


  11. Louisiana, Third World and proud of it. They are happier in the mud than any OWS NIMBY.


  12. In terms of motivating people to get out, a number of people I know are going to institute a Scared Straight program where one is required to spend 3 nights in a row at Live to convince them that staying at home studying ain’t so bad.


  13. The person who penned the Observer article reported that there’s no trailer (manufactured) housing in Ann Arbor. So what’s Sunnyside Park on Packard?
    Chopped liver?


  14. The article title is a riff on the “Safety Dance” song by Men Without Hats? Just checking.


  15. i think it is a B-52s song called “Roam”


  16. About the only song I can stand from that gadawful “band.”


  17. I would think “Private Idaho” would ring a few bells around here.


  18. Certainly not “Rock Lobster”, since neither real rock nor real lobster has been seen in “Twee Town” (esp. Main St.) for at least 10 years


  19. B-52’s song is the proper match, you’re right I think. Tho mine has similarities too. (And may have INSPIRED the later song in parts, who knows…)


  20. “hah, i only hope that i can remain as bitter as you have by the end of my three year stint at u of m.

    maybe the crappiness of this place motivates people to get the **** out. any place is better.
    any place.”

    I came to this site for cynicism and found such idiocy–such spiritless tone-deafness to anything of human value–that it reminded me how Ann Arbor is really so underrated, and not just on this site… We all know the things that are wrong with the place, but compared to what? where does this grad student think there is a better community, real community, that is still in the U.S.? “Any place” (not an English major, apparently)? You don’t have to go to Louisiana to find devastation of community, it’s just about everywhere.


  21. ergo: Private Idaho


  22. I da ho? No, YOU da ho!


  23. “Most every neighborhood was exquisitely well kept.”

    Once again I’m reminded how everything is relative. If I only knew where they hell you might come from in order to make this statement.


  24. posted by Frank Furter on June 3rd, 2006 at 10:27 am

    Gees. Dirty Back Roads by the B-52’s. Cute adaptation by the way.

    I haven’t thought of that song in 20 years. Now I’ve got to find it and play it…..

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