Just Here to Hurt

Ann Arbor has a Friendster profile. Among Tree Town’s more notable testimonials from her 260 friends:

  • When I am travelling, people ask me where my home is. I usually tell them “Right about where I am standing.” But I tell them also that my spiritual home is Ann Arbor. I love to nestle in you ample bosom!…Everyone wants to be like Ann, she is used as the yardstick by which coolness is measured. When they say, “It;s kinda like Ann Arbor…” then you know it’s not. Ann, You taught me love and showed me how to free myself of the chains of convention.

  • Ann, you nearly ruined me. I’ve beaten boys on the river, sold crack in Liberty Plaza and been pimped at the library for candy. The endless pizza, the hideous coffees, the rubbery tofu - it’s all here and I’ve survived it all. Thanks Ann, for keepin’ me alive - just barely, by the skin of my balls… but alive.
  • Although you wouldn’t take me for the second year in a row, I still harbor no bad feeling towards you, Ms. AA. I’ve just recently shacked up with your Siamese twin and we’ve been getting awfully cuddly — even though she’s more of a plain Jane, she and I both agree that you may be over doing the whole urban sprawl deal. Your a beautiful town, there’s no reason for all that surgery; not even to help your self esteem.

16 Responses to “Just Here to Hurt”


  1. Typical of Ann Arbor: they haven’t gotten the clue yet that Friendster is done, and everyone’s moved to MySpace.com or something else.


  2. And it never even got past the “beta” version.


  3. AAIO,

    I was barfing inside, then outside the Pretzel Bell on the night of my 21st birthday, long before AA got overrated.
    Haven’t been back in more than a decade.

    Perhaps it is as you say.
    Sorry to have given you concern.

    But damn it, Google works just fine.

    Ilya@yahoo.co.uk


  4. “… Sorry to have given you concern.”

    I especially liked the part about inside/outside barfing. Spooky.


  5. The term “barfed” isn’t very Annarbour. I submit the more clinical, “vomitted”.


  6. Typical of Leighton, to make an issue of a non issue. Sad really.


  7. Typical of Dan: Not realizing when someone’s joking and making a comment about how uncool they are.


  8. Damn, Ann Arbor’s friend in the “Michigan Dutch” shirt is fine!


  9. Heh. I tried to see it and got a “Not Connected” error. Guess I don’t know Ann Arbor as well as I thought.
    js


  10. No, truly I barfed.
    Then we went across the street to Mr. Flood’s Party to begin again.

    I was not uncool once, just as Ann Arbor was once not overrated.

    Ilya


  11. Ypsi has a profile too, you know, but a mere 24 friends: http://www.friendster.com/user.jsp?id=3878278


  12. Ypsi, being the urban pioneer ;) abandoned Friendster for Myspace.com in the form of the Elbow Room. It has added has almost 100 “friends” in the last 2 weeks, but it’s mostly strippers from Deja Vu.


  13. Ypsi, being the urban pioneer ;) abandoned Friendster for Myspace.com in the form of the Elbow Room. It has added has almost 100 “friends” in the last 2 weeks, but it’s mostly strippers from Deja Vu.


  14. Leighton is right, people are getting turned off of Friendster because the people who run it are humorless…people were posting pix of their pets and having fun hooking up their pets…but Friendster shut that down…bah, boring.


  15. Whah! I want Ann Arbor to let me join her network, but she just ignores me. I never thought I would feel this way, but Ann, please take me back… I promise that all those mean things I said were just in anger… I was jealous…insensitive… I’ll never mistreat you again… Ann, you’re such a cruel mistress, but I looove you….


  16. Heh, Ypsi has 2 freindster profiles…this one with more members…and Friendster is finally moving past a crawl…kinda:

    http://www.friendster.com/user.jsp?id=884611