EmarketingMag printed the results (scroll down) of a study on yuppies by The Media Audit, which is apparently some kind of demographic survey. The results? Of the 85 “markets” they studied, Ann Arbor had the highest percentage of yuppies.
“Yuppies are an asset to any market,” someone at the firm producing the survey observed. “Their buying power is already substantial and it’s going to continue to grow for decades.”
Seen on a bumper sticker today: “i’d rather not be in ann arbor.” Same colors, same font. Does anyone know where we can get one of these?
More local-business fetishization in the Daily. We’re sure that Herb David Guitar Studio is a great place to buy musical instruments, but can it really be said that guitar-store chains, along with Starbucks, display a “well-planned insipidness”? “Hang that nondescript watercolor closer to the door…no, something’s not right, we’re still not projecting the right image. It’s got to scream insipid.”
Herb David has been successful even though “other stores offering ethnic and vintage instruments have folded or moved to Detroit.” The writer views its staying power as evidence that “goodwill has triumphed over market forces.” But isn’t it possible that Herb David, described here as “one of the best-known music stores in the world,” is around specifically because of market forces - consumers preferring it to inferior competitors? We’re no free-market libertarian, but sometimes a local business closes up shop for non-sinister reasons.
Did you know that the state of Michigan offers tax credits for the upkeep of historic-district homes? Neither did we. Even additions to a house qualify, as long as they’re approved. Apparently, tax cuts that just happen to benefit the rich disproportionately are too underhanded; better to go with specifically targeted ones.
This was brought to our attention by an opinion piece in The Ann Arbor News today, in which the following nightmare scenario is envisioned: the house across the street from your beautifully maintained century-old mansion is being covered with gauche vinyl. But wait - it gets much worse. “[T]he entire home is being converted into rental apartments.”
The writer argues for a historic district as a way of preventing this kind of catastrophe. Now, the vinyl would clearly be verboten under historic-district rules. But we weren’t aware that these ordinances also forbid the conversion of houses into apartments. Is this true? If so, then the impact of these districts on students has been greatly understated. The original News article mentioned only that fraternities and sororities might have to pay for expensive repairs.
So maybe it’s time for students to start paying more attention to the activities of the Historic District Commission. Of course, they can be a bit arcane. “Commissioner Bruner stated he preferred the ell gable at ninety degrees to the main gable for its look, water shedding capabilities, and historically - the ell would have a gable perpendicular to the roof,” runs one riveting excerpt. But sometimes they can tend toward high comedy, such as when two commissioners request that “the historic elements be incorporated without it looking old.”
We’ve finally thought up a solution for those townies who love A2’s exquisite art galleries and home furnishing stores but cringe at the sight of the occasional beer bottle on the lawn of a historic home: move to Saugatuck.
Saugatuck, Michigan, to which we were occasionally coerced to go as a child on family vacations, is basically Ann Arbor without any of the things that the Bobos find irksome. A glance at the town’s website reveals uncanny similarities between Saugatuck and A2, or at least the idealized A2.
Saugatuck is mainly known for its art galleries - it calls itself “The Art Coast of Michigan” - and it does boast an incredibly long list. The town’s retail culture is described thus: “Here you peruse. You don’t ’shop’ here. You savor. You wander along on a sensory journey through a melange of cultures, life-styles and tastes. In a retail world increasingly dominated by bigness and sameness, the shops of Saugatuck/Douglas are almost audacious in their individuality.” And one can “walk - in a safe and friendly environment - to almost everything.”
Best of all, there are no students.
Ypsi Rocks’ trash-talking stickers get it mostly right about A2, despite leaning too heavily on the Starbucks/chain-store red herrings that don’t have much to do with what’s really wrong here.
The new plan for Broadway Park will involve lots of places to read things on plaques.
[T]he construction will include some spots that could feature overlooks or historical plaques. … The city has planned for several other spots that can be used for displays, including areas of about 4-by-20 feet overlooking the river, with enough space for people to stop and maybe read something about the area. And there could be space for information on 5-foot bases on lamp posts to be installed at either end of the bridges.
A2 makes The Smoking Gun. The strip club Ron Jeremy made an appearance at may have been in Ypsi, but he stayed right here in Tree Town. We can only hope the hotel was locally owned.
Well, we’ve made it. Today is the one-year anniversary of Ann Arbor is Overrated, formerly Ann Arbor Sucks.
When this blog first started, we thought we’d run out of things to hate about Ann Arbor by the end of the summer. But that hasn’t happened at all. If anything, we now have a much sharper understanding of why we’ve taken on A2 as an adversary. And we hope that you do too.
When The Ann Arbor News took Talk About Town offline, we thought that it would be an insurmountable obstacle. Where would we possibly find local-flavored vignettes about dogs and crafts? But we’ve made it past that setback.
So thanks for reading. And as long as we’re stuck here, and A2 has its rapacious landlords, clueless student journalists and locals who don’t see any reason why a quaint little college town has to include students, we’ll try to keep doing this.
It’s crime as it could happen only in A2 - a car vandalized with the misspelled name of a hippie alternative-education school. From the Ann Arbor News police log:
An Ann Arbor woman told city police Wednesday her car was damaged by vandals who egged it and smeared it with ketchup and mustard.…
Written in ketchup on the truck was “Stiener,” possibly referring to the Rudolph [sic] Steiner Lower School of Ann Arbor, located adjacent to the victim’s property on Newport Road.
Ex-Weathermen and Dylan fans will be disappointed that the vandals didn’t take any of the car’s handles.