ann arbor is overrated.

It’s been a while. But nothing like a new Talk About Town to keep Ann Arbor Sucks away from early retirement.

The Michigan Student Assembly’s objection to a code of conduct that restricts student behavior off-campus seems to have gotten TAT’s dander up. But, “inasmuch as the code doesn’t seem to deter less-than-model citizens from engaging in less-than-model behavior, it’s probably not a big deal for the townies,” they write.

Well, that’s true - the code of conduct hasn’t stopped the recent string of break-ins in student areas.

But they’re still concerned about the reckless collegians. “Of course, it does suggest a certain student point of view, one that’s not overly respectful of the non-university owned, taxpaying parts of town.”

Those would be the parts of town where taxpaying landlords charge students Manhattan-style rents to live in an exurb of Detroit.

But Ann Arbor Sucks heard that Joe College and his co-ed pals have been pulling stunts like swallowing goldfish and stuffing themselves into phone booths. Now, that’s not cool, see?

The Ann Arbor News may be fond of small-town-newspaper-style journalism, but we should all take a moment and thank them for not inflicting this on us.

Ann Arbor Sucks is thinking of going to the next Weblogger Meetup in A2. But, would everyone just throw tomatoes?

Twenty-five. That’s how many Washtenaw County boards currently have openings, according to the eye-opening By the Numbers in today’s Talk About Town. Wouldn’t you have guessed more like five, or 78, or 41? In fact, the last number Ann Arbor Sucks would have thought of, after exhausting the aleph-zero infinity of the integers and rationals, and maybe even the continuum of reals, is 25.

Negative? Ann Arbor Sucks? This weblog can’t begin to match the bile at the BGMusicians forums. Writes torgus to a fellow A2 non-happy-camper,

i live in ann arbor too, there is just something in the air, something in the water, something in the fact that all people here suck and i would rather kill myself than leave my apartment and not get drunk by myself…but you get the idea. im stuck here all the time and there is nothing to do but look at porno on the internet and get loaded everynight. god, i hate this place. i hate it i hate it i hate. that previous line was intended to convey a six-year old’s whimsey…fuck, im bummed out too, man. if only you were a chick so i could hit on you and fail. all i want is possibility…

About the only good thing they can dig up about the place is that Nirvana played here before they were big. Hey, Nirvana played Ann Arbor Sucks’ college dorm too.

Today was the most beautiful day of the year.

All of us A2 residents can let go of a persistent source of worry now that the downtown Borders has learned the proper way to care for one of their window plants. The plant, a jade, displayed yellow leaves, which Talk About Town reports “horrified” resident Heather Mikles. She had the nursery that used to take care of the plants - which “also included a couple of cacti” - inform Borders employees that overwatering in the winter can cause this problem. Let out that breath you’ve been holding.

Also, Ypsilanti Township’s credit seems to have finally recovered from its mid-90’s spending binge, which got to the point where Ann Arbor and Superior Townships staged an intervention to address their friend’s out-of-control sewer and drain habit.

Thanks to a neat new tool, we can now find out the conclusive truth about Ann Arbor, as told by Google:

• ann arbor is an attractive town of more than 100
• ann arbor is a charming town served by the best western executive plaza
• ann arbor is for lovers
• ann arbor is never a problem
• ann arbor is within easy driving distance from all of southeastern michigan and parts of northwestern ohio
• ann arbor is $39 plus tip
• ann arbor is getting too expensive for many people
• ann arbor is boston minus a self

Despite what you’re probably thinking, Ann Arbor Sucks did not write that last one. Unfortunately.

In comparison, let’s see what the Web has to say about Madison:

• madison is a beautiful city situated on an isthmus between two spectacular lakes
• madison is home to the world
• madison is a cute girlfriend
• madison is an upscale escort and massage expert
• madison is in need of a loving home in ct

From this we see that Madison is sexier than Ann Arbor, although occasionally prone to wanderlust.

And Boston?

• boston is heartbreak

Writes David Brooks in the latest Atlantic,

You can construct your own multimedia community, in which every magazine you read, every cable show you watch, every radio station you listen to, reaffirms your values and reinforces the sense of your own rightness. It is possible, maybe even inevitable, that you will slide into a solipsism that allows you precious little contact with people totally unlike yourself. But in your enclosed sphere you will feel very important.

This is precisely what Ann Arbor Sucks has tried and failed to do ever since moving here. Brooks makes it sound so easy - “Now everybody can be a snob,” he writes - especially the part about not talking to people unlike yourself. Where does one sign up?